Oscar De La Hoya Set To Resume Very Straight And Very Manly Duties

While some at MachoChip HQ cheered yesterday’s release of racy Oscar De La Hoya pictures, others silently dropped tears onto their copies of his self-titled debut album (which is on us at all times). We kept looking at the pics like a rubbernecker passing a car crash, and went on and on about how “there’s nothing wrong with that.” But we were deluding ourselves. There’s plenty wrong with it! He’s bending over seductively wearing a wig and a fishnet bodysuit—not even sex with Vanessa Hudgens could wash away the stink (but it’d help).

And worst yet, The Golden (Shower?) Boy hadn’t publicly stated that it wasn’t him in the photos. Luckily, word came late yesterday from his camp that it wasn’t him in those photos.

When pics of pint-size pugilist [Ed. Note: pint-sized? He’d kick your ass!] Oscar De La Hoya started circulating around the Web, we smelled a rat. Now De La Hoya’s agent at CAA, Jack Tiernan, confirms as much.
“They’re completely manufactured,” Tiernan tells Radar. “The pictures have been manipulated or manufactured, and the matter has been referred to his attorney.”

Well, at least that’s settled. Nothing more to see, people, story’s over. We’re sure there’s no longer anything to talk about here. Isn’t there a Champions League game on now or something?
[Cross-dressing De La Hoya Pics Fake] [Radar]
Image [Amazon]