Machochip Commenter Shout Out: We Finally Break The Seal And Go “Ahhh”

Hey readers! We’ve got some news. We’re paying attention to your comments. And guess what? We’re gonna be spotlighting the best commenter of the week. That’s right. We’re gonna use your comments like a heavy-duty gym towel on our sweaty love-handles. Unless you’re pocho_el_güey.Then you’re getting doused today, güey! He’s been tilting the comments like a chubbster on a teeter-totter since Machochip’s inception. And he hasn’t slowed down yet. Well, a little. Some of his most memorable comments after the jump:

• Re: Lionel Messi Doesn’t Want To Be Compared To A Cheating Drunkard Anymore
  

  We’ll just see who’s more whacked from the pressures of the game when he’s riding high on K and dancing in flourescent body paint with dreadlocked hippie girls in Ibiza during the offseason.

• Re: When Clowns And Spider-Man Trampolines Aren’t Enough At Birthday Celebrations
  

  Mark my words: Children of California hipsters will be getting birthday parties like these within three years. Mexicans will be giving more than just childcare to their affluent kids. They’ll be droppin’ bar mitzvah themes on them too.

• Re: “This Is What You Call A ‘Drive-By’”
  

  I think they were so stoned that they were clamoring like two-year olds to turn it back on. Check it out at 1:41. At least they didn’t go all Raiders fan on anybody.

• Re: Heads Up: Manu Ginobli Tangos With Yao Ming
  

  whatever. the shorty che jumped over the chino behemoth and dunked on his ass. gorgeous. now if manu schools shaq like that, he would be a hero.

• Re: Beckham Scores, Fans Holler, And The Los Angeles Galaxy Lose Again. Yippeeee!
  

  um…how is it that this dude craps chiclets and people go silly over it?

  You got a buffer for these gems? Or is this shimmer all naturale? Who cares. We’re off to invade the weekend like a fashionista invading the tabloids. What are you waiting for? Stop slackin’ and start commentin’!
  Image [AP]