Barcelona Will Be Messi-Less For A Month

Imagine if the Red Sox and the Yankees headed into the last series of the year, neck and neck for the division title, with everything including dignity and shit-talking rights on the line. Now imagine if prior to the series “Big Papi” pulls a groin muscle after he hits a homerun and trots around the bases a little faster than usual, causing an uproar with Boston fans, whom will proceed to exclaim that the Yankees now have an advantage because their stud is out. Ok. Enough. “El Clasico” between FC Barcelona and Real Madrid is scheduled for this weekend, but the biggest match-up in ALL sports will be without Argentine wonder-dwarf Lionel Messi.

The Argentinian ace was substituted at the end of the first half of Saturday’s 3-0 win at Valencia after suffering a thigh injury that Spanish media are reporting could keep the 20-year-old sidelined for a month.
Barca have already ruled Messi out of next weekend’s ‘el clasico’ against league leaders Real Madrid at the Nou Camp, with Begiristain admitting: “It is the worst thing that could have happened.
“He is a player that gives us balance and is in great form. We hope to se [sic] him recover very soon. As well as wanting to see him make a quick come back, we want him to come back fully fit,” added Begiristain on his club’s website.

As opposed to him recovering slowly and returning as a fat-tard coke addict, right? You know, for the benefit of hyping this match-up, we think Barca should let him gimp out there Kirk Gibson style because, technically, Argentines are still allowed to use their elbows, palms and forearms.

Barca hit by Messi injury blow [Sporting Life]
Image [Sporting Life]