The Chinese Olympics Will Be Fun And You Will Like It

The Summer Olympics have traditionally been about the competitive spirit of athletes. Well, what happens when American beach volleyball player Misty May’s backside is broken out for the people of communist China to see? The Google-blocked masses will go into hysterics! There’ll be pandemonium! There’ll be… more of the same, actually. That’s because China’s been showing the “Beijing Civilized Workers Cheering Squad” how to cheer, and it couldn’t sound more fun.

One of about 20 cheers approved by authorities, it’s drilled a half-dozen times, orderly repetitions practiced in a meeting hall darkened by stained gray carpet squares and wood paneling. Thirty red and yellow paper lanterns dangle overhead, casting faint light on government slogans papering the walls.

Uh… gooo team! Hopefully this phrase from Zhang Ran, one of the BCWCS leaders, can break that top-20.

Civilization equals order. We need to express the same slogans, think the same and behave the same way. That’s how we become civilized.

It’s not as catchy as “De-fense (clap)(clap)(clap),” but it’s China. Whattya gonna do?
Olympic cheering program hopes to stamp out bad sportsmanship [ESPN]
Image [barstool sports]