Machochip Weekly Recap: Because You Were Simply Too Hungover To Read.

The holidays are unfortunately over so no more sun bathing on our Southern Cali rooftops. We’re headed back to NYC where it’s cold, fucking cold and really fucking cold. But don’t worry folks, here’s the best of the best of the week for ya.

December 31st
• Why does Jose Canseco believe we care?
• Adriano’s driving skills are on par with his soccer skills

January 2nd
• Tom Brady gives fellow pimp Tony Romo some tips about his girlfriend
• Reggie Bush was banging Kim Kardashian in private. Now they are publicly disclosing their engagement. Drama queens.
• What is in and what is out in 2008. You know you care.
• Did someone forget to pick Nery Castillo up at the train station?

January 3rd
• Bulls are usually best slaughtered and cooked medium rare.
• Johan Santana’s hundred million dollar dream continues.
• Floppin’ like a flapper girl on moonshine and speed.
• “Hey, Mike. It was only B-12. I swear.”

January 4th
• Argentina and Mexico to play in Barcelona? Maybe.
• Environmentalists aren’t happy with David Beckham.