Feature: Under New Management

True dynasties are few and far between. Contributing editor Alex Ferreyra has lived to see two of them–the New York Yankees and the Cuban… um, Cuba—change “ownership.” Now he wonders which new head of state can keep the legacy of its preceding owner–George Steinbrenner or Fidel Castro—going longer.
“Under New Management.” It works for dry cleaners, video stores and massage parlors. But what does it do for two of the most storied franchises in modern history—the New York Yankees and the Republic of Cuba?
While some may find the fact that George Steinbrenner and Fidel Castro retired at the same time in history a mere coincidence, I find it fitting given their respective styles. During their tenures, both men loved baseball, yelling at their minions and standing up to revenue sharing and capitalism, respectively—free market ideas they considered detriments to their organizations. But what of the new generation?

Well, new-ish, anyway. Hank and the appropriately-named (Prince) Hal, sons to George and heirs to the throne are 51 and 39; Raul Castro, Fidel’s brother and newly appointed president of Cuba, is 77. Will they be able to carry the torch of hell and fury their blood predecessors hath passed down? As far as I’m concerned, it all comes down to how they handle the media, friends and public, and how well they work with their enemies.
… the media.
The Castros: Uh, what media? Under Fidel Castro, while the newspapers were state-controlled, there was always a burgeoning underground press that had to be suppressed by Castro’s regime. You don’t rule a nation for 40+ years by building a media-stifling infrastructure that collapses just because you’re not there. It will go on, especially considering Raul was the main stifler under his brother’s administration. Plus, state-controlled internet means no bloggers—always a plus.
The Steinbrenners: For the last years of George’s rule, it was evident that he was on the decline and most of the media gave him his space to depart. But before then, their relationship was the definition of love/hate. For every blow up Steinbrenner committed against the media, there was a Saturday Night Live hosting where he freely made fun of himself. Alas, his sons didn’t seem to inherit any of that charisma. Hank has been the talking head so far (leaving Hal to run the actual business side of things), and his attempts at uplifting his team have been clumsy at best. As in, lumping him in with virgins screwing would be kind. For instance, on the Red Sox, Hank had this to say:

Red Sox Nation? What a bunch of bullshit that is…That was a creation of the Red Sox and ESPN, which is filled with Red Sox fans…Go anywhere in America and you won’t see Red Sox hats and jackets, you’ll see Yankee hats and jackets. This is a Yankee country. We’re going to put the Yankees back on top and restore the universe to order.

Yeah, because ESPN has done nothing to hype up the Yankees machine.
Winner? The Castros and their [redacted] control of the media.
… their “friends” in high places.
The Castros: The Castros’ powerful friends include Hugo Chavez and…well, that’s about it, at least on this side of the hemisphere. As long as Cuba is a thorn in America’s side—or until Chavez is assassinated—those two better keep each other on speed dial.
The Steinbrenners: Winning 26 titles does wonders for a team’s popularity amongst the famous like Billy Crystal and Denzel Washington. When Akron, Ohio native and Cleveland Cavalier LeBron James showed up to watch the Yankees-Indians playoff series last year wearing a Yankees cap, he was vilified. But he argued that he grew up with the Yanks as his team. That’s the beauty of winning: it allows you to grow a fanbase of future famous people. Although, with friends like that, you have to expect a little public wavering. When uber-panderer and supposed number one Yankee fan Rudy Guiliani said he was supporting the Red Sox in the World Series last year because he is an “American League” guy, I half-expected Yankee announcer Michael Kay to shiv him in the neck next time he was in New York.
Winner? The Steinbrenners because, while Castro can get a good deal on oil, only the Yanks can get morale-boosting Rudy Guiliani to pump up the staff.
… their enemies.
The Castros: How will the new Cuban government handle dealing with a new American leadership, their most devious threat outside of bad CBS dramas starring Jimmy Smits? When Obama and Hilary debated on whether to end the Cuban embargo, there was an olive branch presented to Raul. But will he grab it if the Dems take the White House? Of course, that’s all a moot point if John McCain becomes president and makes it his top priority to get rid of the Vietnamese, Russian and Cuban threats, along with every pre-1970 danger to America like The Amazing Colossal Man, The Dave Clark Five and hippies.
The Steinbrenners: The Red Sox are obviously the target here… or are they? While Yammerin’ Hank was lambasting the Sox and ESPN (see above), he also presented the possibility that they could work together. It’s like cats and dogs, I tells ya.

“We’ve got a lot of things in common and may be doing some things together, outside of baseball,” Steinbrenner said. Asked what they were, he said, “That’s all I’ll say about that.”

That’s how Kennedy ended his speech about the Bay of Pigs, too. Hmmm…
Winner? None—it’s a push. While there’s hope in each, there are too many moving parts to be able to judge who will come out on top here.
… their public.
The Castros: Yeah, like we saw in Russia, there’s no easing into capitalism. Once the Cuban masses get a taste of freedom their Miami brethren are experiencing, expect a full slide into the cash money system, kicking off the shackles of Communism. It’s at this point the citizenry of Cuba is going to wonder what they got themselves into after being on the phone 25 minutes with DirecTV, wondering why they can’t watch their Simon and Simon reruns when it rains.
The Steinbrenners: While the Red Sox are usually disliked because of their defensive and self-absorbed fan base and big mouth and self-absorbed pitcher Curt Schilling, there are pockets of people who actually are indifferent to them. Not the Yankees. You either hate them or you love them (or are forced to love parts of them because you were handcuffed into taking Robinson Cano in your fantasy draft). But unlike the followers of their Bahstan rivals, these fans are a confident lot—and why shouldn’t they be with history on their side? Having a team that’s won 26 World Series does that for a fans’ psyche.
Winner? The Steinbrenners. As long as they look like they’re trying to win, they’ll have the Bronx burning for a long time.
So it seems to me that the Steinbrenners are the ones to take their team to the next level. Cuba is teetering on the verge of a new system of government, which while historic, doesn’t exactly win championships. Unless, of course, they get help from the Florida Marlins: They’re only 90 miles away and they won two World Series within their first 10 years of existence, one against the Yankees. Hmm. Maybe there’s hope for them yet.