Public Service Announcement: Sharks Kill People In Ixtapa, Mexico.

Living in Mexico City provides us with a the opportunity to visit multiple beaches. But word on the street is that if we want to visit Ixtapa anytime soon, we’ve gotta stay away from the damn ocean. Here’s one account of what’s been going on in the last few months.

Bruce Grimes gingerly clenches his stitched right hand, asserting as best he can that he was accompanied by angels the morning a large bull shark chomped “softly” on his arm as he paddled his surfboard.

“I could feel the inside of its mouth with my hand,” he says while sitting on a small wooden stool inside his downtown surf shop. “It was steely, all hard inside, like a bear trap.”

What’s happening in Ixtapa is a rare occurrence and most scientists are blaming El Niño for warming up waters too much to where sharks are venturing outside of their normal habitat. It’s kind of like real estate developers leaving the San Fernando Valley and pushing out families in Silverlake, Ca. And how are Ixtapians handling the situation? Shark sacrifice, of course. Duh!.

In the aftermath, following a ceremonial shark massacre and community panic one expert described as “everything you saw with the movie ‘Jaws,’ only in Spanish,” mania still flares.

Spanish sharks?!?!? We’ve seen those before!

Aren’t they so nice? All they want to do is show off their razor sharp teeth. And how else can they do that without chomping off a bit of your leg with their sharpened enamel?

Shark attacks cause mania in Ixtapa area [LA Times]