Carlos Tevez Would Be Hawt If He Didn’t Look Like A Caveman

You see that pot-mark encrusted mug to the right? If it weren’t for that, Carlos Tevez believes he would be a superstar the likes of Cristiano Ronaldo and, er, David Beckham.

Tevez, 24, said: “I don’t have the same marketable image as a Ronaldo or a Lionel Messi. If I tried to work on my image, it would change a lot of things. But I’m not like that.
“I pack all my effort in on the pitch, throwing myself on the floor for each ball, putting my life into each game.
“I give everything to win each match and leave it there.

And we applaud that, man. The world doesn’t need another egotistical, pink shorts wearing, conquerer of every female he wants sports star! We want normal and ugly! Unfortunately, Tevez is getting stripped of the opportunity to make millions via endorsements because his looks are far from enticing, but he can be a hero to ugly people, ya know? He’s like “Rorschach” from “The Watchmen.” And that guy kicked people’s asses. As long as he finds the net enough times, people (and corporations) will love him. Just look at Dennis Rodham.
I could be next Becks [The Sun]
Image [Manchester United]