The Aussies Get Dirty With Their Snaps Against England, Accuse Them Of Being Soap Dodgers

Apparently the gloves are off between nations during this edition of The Games. First we had this slight against the host Chinese by the Spaniards; then there was the French swimmers talking smack against the American before choking on their fromage as the Yanks took gold from them by a fingertip; now the head of Australia’s Olympic committee has told the world that he thinks the British swimmers are dirty… literally. Apparently looking like Pig Pen from Peanuts hurts you aerodynamically in the water or something.

Asked if he was surprised by Great Britain’s good performances in the swimming, Coates said they had done well - for a nation short on pools and soap. “Great Britain may have been in lane seven and eight but, um, they seemed to be getting there for a country that has very few swimming pools and not much soap,” Coates said.

Coates’s remark, while tongue in cheek, are sure to fuel the growing rivalry between Australia and its old sporting enemy during the Beijing Games. Sports Minister Kate Ellis has already bet her British counterpart Sports Minister Gerry Sutcliffe on which country will stand higher in the medal count.

So what’s the prize–something rote like exchanging a case of Vegemite for a case of Earl Gray tea? We’d take it one step further and make the loser eat a bar of Lifebouy soap like Ralphie in A Christmas Story. It’s not nice, but it’s a lot better than the alternative–getting a pounding like Private Pyle in Full Metal Jacket.
AOC president John Coates questions British hygiene standards [Daily Telegraph]
Image [Sun UK]