Jennifer Love Hewitt In A Bikini Again: Oh, Get Over It

The blogs are all a-flutter with this new set of Jennifer Love Hewitt bikini pics, two years after the civil rights icon stood up for other “fat” size 2 girls everywhere. As Latino men who require junk in the trunk, we are totally puzzled by all of this.

This website is, of course, loaded with galleries of astronomically hot space mutants (look, there’s one now!) but we are equal-opportunity objectifiers around here. And, actually, that doesn’t even really come into play in the case of Jennifer Love Hewitt. No, she’s not a six foot tall Brazilian supermodel. Very few people are. That’s why six-foot tall Brazilian supermodels get paid millions of dollars to just kind of stand there. They are in the 99.9th percentile of global hotness.

A bunch of blogs are having a good old time calling Jenny Love “fat” or “dumpy” or whatever today, and that’s just insane. Yeah, she’s got a little cushion. Whatever. There’s not a guy out there, certainly not one reading a Latino culture blog, who would walk past that tennis court in real life and go, “Check out the dumpy girl!” Oh, puh-leaze. In real life, a girl who looks like Jennifer Love Hewitt is in more danger of a cluster of snarling dudes sizing up their chances and thinking, “I’m gonna take a big bite out of that ass tonight.”

At least that’s what we’d be thinking.

Is this a bedroom poster or stroke mag fodder? Of course not. But a simple reminder for dudes that look at this and snort at “tubby” Jennifer Love Hewitt: she’s still waaaaaaay out of your league. And this set of pics serves pretty well for those girl-next-door conquest fantasies. You can kid yourself that she’s attainable (she’s still totally not), but that can be its own good time.

Also, to be fair, she’s just a nightmarish actress, and she’s obviously photog-baiting in her little heels and bikini. And, to be even fairer, we’re not pretending that “we’d still hit that” is some sort of chivalrous post-feminist gesture. We just don’t dig on wafer-thin girls, and anything that moves away from that is a step in the right direction. So carry on with pretending to play basketball or tennis or whatever, Jennifer! We promise to still objectify you!

Click on our little tennis pro down there to check out the full gallery and judge for yourself.