Rambo 5: Rambo VS. Juanes On The U.S. Mexico Border

Just when Juanes was ready to swoop down on a giant, naked, baby powdered unicorn carrying peace between his teeth to the U.S.-Mexico border, Nu Image/Millennium Films announces that Sylvester Stallone is set to reprise his role as John J. Rambo for a fifth installment of his can't lose franchise. (Seriously, 2008's Rambo, grossed $150 million worldwide despite the fact that he's old as fuck.) This time, Stallone will direct himself in the story of our hero hunting down the kidnappers of a young girl on the U.S.-Mexico border. "The new film reportedly sees the former Green Beret fighting his way through human traffickers and drug lords," says the U.K.'s Guardian. Tom Tancredo will be sucking popcorn from a bong. Who will win? Lovey dovey, huggy poo poo Juanes or a some good, old-fashioned Hollywood ultra violence? You decide!

Rambo 5: The shooting begins [The Guardian] Stallone readies for fifth 'Rambo' [Variety]